One of the most painful things for a Christian parent is to see their children not follow the Lord. Watching a child turn from God and towards the world, heading for certain pain and destruction, must be very difficult.
I am raising seven children. Some are older, and some are younger. My number one prayer for each of them is that they follow God. Whatever that might be for their life, I know if they learn to trust God, they will be fine.
In the Bible, there are many examples of great men, far greater and wiser than myself, losing their children. Not once, not twice, but over and over again in the Bible, we see this. This makes me concerned and causes me to want to learn why this happens and what I can do differently as a parent.
Eli’s sons, Hophni and Phinehas, were wicked and did not honor God (1 Samuel 2).
David’s son Absalom rebelled against him and sought to take the throne (2 Samuel 15).
Solomon’s son Rehoboam’s harsh policies led to the kingdom’s split (1 Kings 12).
Hezekiah’s son Manasseh did evil in the sight of the Lord (2 Kings 21).
Even Samuel’s sons, Joel and Abijah, took bribes and perverted justice (1 Samuel 8:3).
These stories remind us of the challenges and heartbreaks that come with parenting, even for those who are deeply committed to God.
After reading about these great men and how they lost their children, the verse that comes to mind is Deuteronomy 6:5-9.
This text touches on everything that these men did to lose their children and becomes a guide for anyone wanting to raise their children today.
It’s important to note that our children are their own people and will make their own choices. So there’s nothing in the world that’s a guarantee for parents. But with God’s guidance and grace, we can apply these lessons and see our kids serve the Lord to the best of our ability.
1. We Have to Be Real
Deuteronomy 6:5 “And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.”
Notice God starts off with the job of the parent first. The parent must be the same at home as we are at work and as we are at church. We cannot be double-minded. Children pick up on this and know right away if the parents really believe this “God stuff.” Our actions speak louder than our words.
Jesus said he would rather have us hot or cold, but never lukewarm. If we act hot in church and cold in our home, we are lukewarm, and our children will see this and not want to follow God. We must serve God everywhere, all the time, with all our heart.
2. We Have to Spend Time with Our Kids
Deuteronomy 6:7 “And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”
Notice the Bible says we must teach our children about God. But pay close attention to where it says to teach them: when we sit, walk, in bed, and when we wake up.
It’s our job as a parent to always be teaching our children about God. We cannot delegate this to the church, Sunday school, or Christian school. Those institutions are there to support and reinforce what we teach, but it is our obligation to teach our children. This means we must spend time with them constantly!
3. We Must Equip Them to Navigate the World Biblically
Deuteronomy 6:8-9 says, “And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.”
The “gates” mentioned in Deuteronomy symbolize the entrance and exit points of our homes—places of transition between our private and public lives. By writing God’s commandments on our gates, we are reminded to carry His teachings with us into the world.
Instead of isolating our children from the world, we need to prepare them to engage with the world and to make an impact for Christ’s sake. The Bible teaches us to keep God’s commandments visible in our lives, reminding our children of His presence as they move in and out of our homes.
As parents, our responsibility is to help our children live out the Bible today. We must explain the reasons behind our faith, so our children can think biblically and apply these principles in their daily lives.
By grounding our children in God’s word and demonstrating how to live it out both at home and in the world, we prepare them to navigate life’s challenges confidently and faithfully. This equips them not only to maintain their own faith but also to reach the world around them.
Raising children to follow the Lord is a challenging but vital task. By being real in our faith, spending time with our kids, and training them how to act in this world, we can guide them towards a life that honors God. Let us seek God’s guidance and grace as we apply these lessons in our parenting journey.
